Oh, the other...
Others make me laugh. Others share my joy, How I love them!
Then again...Others piss me off. Others make me cry, Am I better off without them?
Others open our eyes... if we let them. That, to me, is one of the most beautiful things. After a lifetime of relationships of all kinds, I'm only now beginning to understand one of the most powerful keys to personal growth and we only have access to it in relating with others!
In paying attention to the ways other people make us feel, we're able to see things in ourselves that we've been ignoring or refusing to bring to the surface. I've been discovering the power of others being mirrors for my shadows. These are usually things that aren't serving me, let alone anyone else. Even though it's a little hard to get used to, I imagine the use of these mirrors can be a superpower for personal growth once you get the hang of it.
So far I've been noticing that what triggers me about someone else, when someone does something that really annoys me or makes me angry or sad, I need to stop pointing the finger and putting the blame on them.
It's times like those where we actually to have a look at ourselves. We can ask: "Is this feeling justified? Is this actually something about me?" If we look into that other person and what they did that got some kind of reaction out of us, we can see the reflection of something in the depths of our soul that needs some attention.
It happens again and again for me: the pattern is becoming clear. Which is great, because I can spot the mirror quicker and start peeling back layers of things that are holding me back in all kinds of ways!
Mirrors in Music
The same actually goes for music. It's the best relief for expression and sorting out emotions I can't understand... I didn't realize it before, but it also acts as a tool for revealing things I don't know how to or want to see.
For example, this week I've been feeling frustrated by others' lack of initiative, their fear of taking chances, putting themselves out there and going after their dreams. I made the connection as I was modifying the song "Bye Bye Honey" by Nazca for my own purposes and it turned out to be a helpful and inspiring mirror.
The song was a mirror for sorrow inside me and it was bringing me to tears. I knew something had to be uncovered... I thought I was singing to someone else, but even that person was the mirror (mirrors within mirrors... meta mirrors, omg!)!
I've always known music was powerful, but seeing it as an actual mirror seems to take it to a whole other level. I'm starting to feel it's the best tool in my soul work toolbox for soul communication.
If you feel moved by a song, ask yourself: "What is this bringing up for me?" With Bye Bye Honey, it's clear enough. I'm saying goodbye to that part of myself that isn't in the present, that is too afraid to speak her truth, to be herself. Goodbye to the one who lives in the shadows out of fear, to the one who won't let herself act on her dreams. Goodbye to the one that won't spread her wings and fly! Goodbye!
Keeping this in mind as I continue with my musical expression project called What Naked Sounds Like!
What's your experience with relationship mirrors? With music helping you heal? Does my version of Bye Bye Honey bring up anything for you?